Our Fair

I went to the fair today. my thoughts:

• the mechanized llamas are getting more and more life-like each year it seems.
• my family came home with a cartload of prizes for the stuff they entered, it reminds me of the movie babe and disgusts me. no family should have this much raw talent. thank heaven none of my siblings realize how gifted they are. I have and it's continually threatening to ruin my life. (/sacrasm)
• horses time their craps for exactly when the lady-announcer calls attention to them during the judging - i'm sorry, but they do, and you can't convince me that they don't realize exactly what they are doing.
• the ugliest carneys have the most beautiful children.
• turkeys are disgusting, I stared at one for 5 minutes and tried desperately to remember exactly how many of them I've eaten over the years and then erase the memory.
• the only cool bunnies are the really big, fat ones that remind me of the movie "Night of the Lupus"
• George Orwell must have never been to an actual farm, there's no way on earth pigs can stand on their hind legs, I tried to coax one to for almost 20 minutes with a carrot (that's what you're supposed to use, right?) and it wouldn't even get off the ground. It was worse than a hippy.
• I was nonchalantly walking down a whole long aisle of llama paddocks, when my brother casually reminded me that llamas can spit over 20 feet. what little love I had for the fair died that moment.